A Team Player!

Another small pin prick of light at the end of a very long tunnel. That's what we saw today. For financial reasons, we have been scaling back on William's ABA therapy, in the hopes that we can stretch our savings to the end of the year. (Not that anything happens at the end of the year, it's just a goal...a line in the sand, I guess you could say.)

So today at breakfast, it's just William and me. Everyone else is either still sleeping or downstairs in the basement. (Thunderdome, as I call it) All of the sudden, he looks out the window, and says "Sure is a bunch of 'em"

Now, to the casual observer, this is fairly meaningless, but for William this is drop-your-spoon-in-shock kind of stuff. This was a spontaneous colloqualism -- he does not say something unless he hears it first, and I am sure I didn't say it. Admittedly, I couldn't get him to eloborate on what there is a bunch of: leaves? grey hairs? Who knows.

But it's a signal from him that we're maybe we're doing the right thing by cutting back on the ABA. This therapy's criticism is that it tends to create rote behavior, it does not encourage dynamic thought. It's a very good treatment to get a kid to learn basic things brush his teeth or ask for what he wants, potty training, and other basic skills that are necessary.

(As far as therapy goes, we are starting to move in an additional direction, to something called RDI. We'll write a bunch more about that later, that's a lot more posts all by itself.)

The point of this meandering rant is that the affirmation that we're doing something right isn't coming from a doctor, therapist, teacher, or anyone else outside of our 4 walls. It's coming directly from William. That's HUGE. We've got a long way to go, but at least we know he's coming along.

A Team Player?

Last week on Thursday morning, Nickie left at 6am to take a friend of ours to the airport. William's typical time to get started in the morning is between 5:30 and 6:30. I sleep very heavily. To quote one of my favorite movies, if I am asleep, I "wouldn't hear a dump truck driving through a nitro-glycerin plant." You starting to sense where I am going with this?

At approximately 7:20 am, our neighor Debbie, God bless her, comes into the house, yelling, "Jawn, Nickie, we have a prawblem!" (She's from Brooklyn)

Seems that William decided to take his big wheel down the street for a morning ride. Ever the free spirit, he decided to go without any pants on.

Now, the neighbors for about 5-10 houses down on either side know who our kid is, and are not ever surprised by seeing a half-naked kid on a big wheel, eating his morning banana. But William got so far, so fast, that a guy leaving for work all the way around the block, probably 1/4 mile from the house thought this sight was kind of strange. I am sure he was thinking "now there's something you don't see every day."

So he fetches William, starts asking him some questions, to which William responded, "it's time to go to the car wash." That was enough for the good samaritan, who started walking back up our street with William, and happened upon a neighbor who DID in fact know who this kid is. So they start up the street with William toward our house, picking up 2 more neighbors along the way.

By the time they ring the doorbell, there is a small army outside of my house, I am opening the door, still trying to get my pants on, rubbing sleep out of my eyes, trying to catch the license plate of the dump truck.

Long story short, the neighbors familiar with William smile, chuckle, and head for home. Good Samaritan #1 leaves with a very suspicious look on his face, probably thinking he better look up the number to social services.

Insurance Woes

So, I have logged 15 phone calls to United Healthcare over the past 11 months, each lasting at least 20 minutes. That is a LOT of lost time. Oh, but it's worth it when I hang up believing that once again, I made the mistake, but if I do this one last fax, certified mailing, etc... I have fallen for that one, well, 15 times!

We were promised reimbursement from United only, ONLY after I happened upon this amazing woman who first informed me there was no information regarding the need for a behavioural therapy lasting more that one hour per session for an autistic person...and who then proceded to record what ABA Therapy is and why a child with limited language/social or self-help skills would need it. I couldn't believe an insurance company wouldn't know any of this. It's not like autism just showed up!

So she does her part and passes it on to the "team". We've waited 2 months for that "promise". Now, I suspect they may be reimbursing a small amount of that promise through our DAN! doctor. What the ****?! Yes, our medical doctor who has nothing to do with behavioural therapy. United Healthcare is the group who berated me for not knowing, "There is a mental health side and a medical health side to United Healthcare. I'm sorry your paperwork has been lost 7 times." Duh...

Now the latest is that I might be able to get CO Autism Society involved and potentially receive money paid last year, even. Now we're talking some serious cash! This would change our entire lives. No more borrowing money from in laws, no more fundraising events, no more marital strife over how much money I spent in groceries this month, no more crying because the Autism Medicaid Waiver cannot bring William on yet, even after a year of waiting.

I'm not an insurance-hater. I'm not a Hillary lover. I just want my baby to be given the chance to be a functioning human. John is killing himself at work with the hope that he can make a big bonus that will cover William's therapy. Meanwhile, our children never see him, I'm hurt that we get his sloppy seconds, and there's still not enough money even after those long hours.

UGH...

BUT, somehow, we are provided for.

We have a dear friend who threw a magnificent fundraising event called, "Finding Color in a Black and White World". It was the most touching evening...and the money that was raised all for William was unbelievable! Another friend applied for a grant for William and got it! Friends have prayed for us, they've taken our children for the weekend so we could get away. Our neighbors watch out for our wandering William...even when he's roaming their yard naked...with such village-like love.

In the end, I think what has happened with our finances is rediculas, don't get me wrong. But, I also think this is the greater plan for John and I to really think about what we are doing with our lives. We've been forced to stop and appreciate the functional washing machine. We think twice before buying a coffee at Starbucks. We now buy tshirts for the kids at Salvation Army. And why not? There's one more dollar for Will's therapy...and maybe one more dollar insurance will perhaps, one day, out of the most random collision of circumstance, reimburse us!? And then, in one flail swoop, college will be paid for.